Healthy Ways to Deal with Disappointment

Healthy Ways to Deal with Disappointment

Healthy Ways to Deal with Disappointment

First: take a moment to wallow in the disappointment. Accept how you are feeling and try to name the emotion. This may be by crying, stomping around, saying out loud what is disappointing you, questioning why this happened. Accept that what is happening is a disappointment. You did not want or expect the event to happen. This is not what you perceived happening.
Second: do a reality check. Is this really a bad thing? Can you fix the situation to turn it around to not be so disappointing? Look objectively at the problem. Reduce negative self-talk and do not go down the blame/shame/fault road.
Third: remember you have control over how you react to disappointment. You are the one to choose if you react negatively or positively to the situation. Decide right up front can you turn this around before your disappointment turns to irritation, anger, resentment or another negative emotion.
Fourth: do not stay in stuck in the negativity. The longer you wallow in the disappointment the more it will grow and the more you will be discouraged. Judge Judy speaks of disappointment and states she allows herself 15 minutes to cry and wallow then she seeks solutions and moves on.
Fifth: avoid anxious reactions in order to lower stress around the disappointment. Meditate, take a walk, drink a cup of tea, do something to reduce the anxious feelings before they overwhelm you and make you stuck in the disappointment.
Six: put the disappointment in perspective. Is this something that will lead to a better outcome? Is there some lesson to be learned from this disappointment that will help me live a better life? How can I frame this situation for a more positive outcome?
Seven: do not continually speak of the disappointment without informing people how you found a solution. Sometimes speaking of the disappointment over and over feels like it is helpful but when others begin to attack you or judge you for your reaction to the disappoint the conversation moves from this happened to me and I am disappointed to you are bad because you were disappointed.
Eight: do not take it personally. This is difficult because you may feel as if it is a decision you made that lead to the disappointment but know up front that the decision you made was made with the information you had at the time, and if it lead to disappointment, then you need to research ways to not make the same decision again.
Nine: journaling your disappointment can lead to a solution. Name how you are feeling, what the situation was that led to the disappointment and how you can control your life to change the situation.
Ten: self-preservations are a human function. We truly do focus on the negative in our lives. Develop positive thinking strategies to not become stuck in the negative.
Eleven: create a gratitude list each day. This will support the truth that not everything that happens to you is negative. It also will allow you to realize ten minutes of disappointment in a 24-hour period should not make your whole day negative.
Twelve: take a deep breath and clear your mind after a disappointment. Give yourself time to relax and then attack the situation with positive solutions. Practice the art of letting go, do not allow the disappointment to swallow you up or taint other situations in your life. Letting go is important once you have found a solution.


Comments are closed.